Shit Nobody Told Me: Written All Over My Face


Title: Written All Over My Face
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing(s): Sam/Dean
Warnings/Tags: No on-screen sex, just lots of awkwardness post loss of virginity
Alternate Link:  AO3

Summary/Inspiration: “I thought everyone would know I lost my virginity,
so I said a lot of awkward things and kept eying everyone the next day,
waiting for them to call me out on it.  I made a fool of myself and
everyone thought I was being an ass." 

Wondering what I’m doing? See my original post about Shit Nobody Told Me, part of The Fucklets Series.

Written All Over My Face

If Sam would’ve known, he probably could’ve said something or maybe
tied Dean up and left him on the bed in the motel room while he went out
to get breakfast, but he didn’t.  He had no idea.

"Hey,” Dean drawled as their waitress came up to the table.

“Hi, what can I get for you?” she asked, politely ignoring the way Dean was smirking at her.

I’m really, really hungry this morning, ya know,” he said, flashing a
smile at her that had Sam scooting down in the booth and wishing the
floor would swallow them up.

“Okay,” the woman said, then turned to Sam.  "Do you know what you want?“

kind of felt bad for her, but he felt even worse for himself.  How was
he supposed to know his twenty-seven-year-old brother had never gotten
around to losing his virginity before last night?  Sam had lost his
virginity in the back of a Pinto to a girl named Suzie when he was
fifteen, and the way Dean acted Sam had assumed his brother got laid
more often than he did.

"I’ll just take the breakfast special,” Sam said.  "Eggs over easy and rye toast.“

opened his mouth, but Sam couldn’t take it.  He could almost feel the
embarrassing line his brother was about to lay on the poor woman.

"He’ll have the same only with scrambled eggs,” Sam blurted.

“Ooh, ordering for me, Sammy?” Dean asked, then winked at the woman.

“Dude, knock it off,” Sam said as the woman hurried away.

it’s not like I can hide the fact that you popped my cherry last
night,” Dean said, rolling his eyes.  "Might as well act like I had a
good time instead of blushing and stuttering my way through the day.“

sighed.  "No one can tell you lost your virginity last night.  It’s not
like it changes the way you look.  There’s no stamp on your forehead.”

Dean frowned at him.  "You don’t have to worry about us getting in trouble or anything.  Nobody here knows we’re brothers.“

not the point,” Sam said, but then the waitress brought them their
coffees and Sam cringed as Dean made some ridiculous comment about how
hard the booth’s benches were.  Sam tried his best to ignore it.


“Dean, would you please stop it?” Sam begged.  "You’re going to get arrested for harassment or something.“

Dean yanked his arm out of his brother’s grasp and scowled at him.  "Did you see the way that guy looked at me?”

doesn’t know you lost your virginity last night!” Sam said, then
realized how loudly he’d said it when a woman in track pants and a
glittery shirt huffed and moved to the next aisle in the grocery store.

“Sam, you can just stop it, okay?” Dean said, then shrugged.  "I’m not embarrassed that everybody can see it.“

Sam counted to ten in his head as Dean happily tossed another bag of salt into the cart and moved down the aisle.


The bank teller was still sputtering when Sam grabbed Dean’s arm and dragged him away from the poor, traumatized man.

"Let go of me!” Dean growled, but Sam had a good grip and didn’t let go until they were outside.

pushed Dean against the side of the bank and pressed his chest against
Dean’s.  "If you think it’s so obvious, then you should know when I lost
my virginity, so go ahead, tell me when I lost it.“

shrugged.  "You must’ve lost it when you were in college.  Oh, was it
Jess?  Dude, way to go!  I bet she was all experienced and taught you so

Sam rolled his eyes.  "I was fifteen.  Lost it to Suzie Miller in Nampa, Idaho.“

frowned, thinking about it for a moment.  "Fifteen?  Nampa.  Oh, when
Dad and I took out the ghost of that serial killer,” he said, nodding.  
Then he paused, face screwing up in confusion.  "I don’t remember you
acting different after you… oh.“

Sam almost felt bad for him.  
Almost.  The blush spread from his cheeks to his ears and even his neck.
 "Nobody can tell,” Sam said yet again.

“I made an ass of myself today,” Dean said, letting out a huff of laughter as he shook his head.

“Yeah, you did,” Sam said, leaning in closer and smiling at his dork of a brother, “but you also got laid last night.”

Dean chuckled.  "Yeah, I did.  And I wanna do it again tonight.“

if you stop traumatizing the bank teller,” Sam said, failing to hide
his smile.  "We still need info out of him, and I think he’s a little
scared now.“

Dean snorted.  "He should be scared.  Dean
Winchester lost his virginity last night.  No one is safe from my
seductive charm now,” he said as he slapped Sam’s ass and headed for the
door to the bank.

Sam smiled as he followed his brother back inside the building.

Shit Nobody Told Me: Drunk Sex

Title: Drunk Sex
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing(s): Cain/Kevin
Warnings/Tags:  Drunk sex, fucking, falling asleep during sex
Alternate Link:  AO3

Wondering what I’m doing? See my original post about Shit Nobody Told Me, part of The Fucklets Series.

Drunk Sex

Cain filled his shot glass again, then smirked at Kevin.  Kevin nodded, already wobbling on the chair a little.

“You’re not stopping yet, are you?” Cain asked the kid.

shook his head, forcing himself to keep a straight face.  Yeah, so he
thought Cain was really fucking hot.  Yeah, so he had challenged the old
guy to a drinking game.  Cain didn’t need to know that Kevin could damn
well hold his liquor even for a small guy.

“All right, then,” Cain said, holding up his glass before downing it.

down his own shot and set the glass on the table.  Cain licked his
lips, and Kevin couldn’t take it anymore.  He got up, walked over to
Cain, and crawled onto his lap, straddling his legs.

“Mind if I sit here instead?” Kevin asked, slurring his words just a bit.

Cain smiled.  "Not at all.“

the next shot, Kevin ‘accidentally’ squirmed on Cain’s lap.  The shot
after that he pretended to be dizzy and dropped his forehead down onto
Cain’s shoulder, snuggling against him and practically humping him.

Cain rubbed over his back, down his sides, and slid his hands over Kevin’s jeans clad ass.  Kevin hummed appreciatively.

"You tired of this game?” Cain asked.

Kevin pulled back and grinned at Cain.  "You should put me to bed.“

didn’t hesitate to carry the kid to his bedroom and strip him with
clumsy fingers, the alcohol settling in and making everything warm and

Stretching, licking, biting, a few kisses and Cain was
inside him, fucking him with a big cock that hit all the right places.  
Cain wasn’t nearly as rough in bed as Kevin had thought he’d be, but
that was fine.  Kevin just wanted to get laid, and Cain was doing a good
job of that.

Well, he was until he came, groaned out his orgasm, then flopped down onto Kevin and fell asleep.

"Hey,” Kevin said, poking at the man on top of him.  "Dude, get up.“

but snoring and a heavy weight that didn’t really hinder his breathing,
but it definitely wasn’t Kevin’s idea of fun.  He hadn’t even had an
orgasm himself.

"Oh, c’mon!” Kevin growled, squirming and trying to push Cain off.

finally gave up, Cain still inside him and on top of him.  He fell
asleep that way, having learned is lesson and hoping Cain didn’t sleep
that long.  Cain made up for it by fucking him the next morning, then
blowing him later that day after he’d made him breakfast, apologizing
yet again for turning Kevin into a comfortable bed.

 "Nobody told me drunk sex can be a bad idea.  He passed out on top of
me, and because he’s a whole Hell of a lot bigger than me, I couldn’t
move, so I just had to wait until he woke up.“

Shit Nobody Told Me: It Went Where?

Title: It Went Where?
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing(s): Sam/Pamela
Warnings/Tags:  Wall sex, rough sex, slipped condom
Alternate Link:  AO3

Wondering what I’m doing? See my original post about Shit Nobody Told Me, part of The Fucklets Series.

It Went Where?

Sam had never used a condom before.  Why would he need to?  He didn’t
sleep around, and the woman who took his virginity was the one he was
going to spend the rest of his life with.  Along came Ruby, and there
was no reason to bother wearing a condom when a demon can keep their
vessel disease-free.

“Harder, c’mon,” Pam said, yanking on his hair and scratching her nails down his back.  "C’mon, kid.  Fuck me!“

panted, sweat dripping from the end of his nose onto her left breast.  
She was wild in bed, and even more so when he hefted her up and fucked
her against the wall.

He bit at her breast, and she arched her
back, trying to force him in deeper.  He winced, not nearly as strong as
when he had demon blood running through his veins, but she was tight
and hot around his cock, and he just kept fucking her.

"Oh, right there!  Fuck, yeah,” she cried out as something fell off the wall and crashed to the floor.

grabbed her ass, the fingers of his right hand slipping between her
cheeks.  She whimpered as he brushed over her hole, and when she didn’t
slap him for taking such liberties, he pushed his middle finger in.

“Oh!  Oh, Sam!  Sam, fu-oh fuck!” she screamed, her pussy and asshole clenching around him.

“Ah, fuck, so fuckin’ tight!” Sam gasped, fucking her through her orgasm.

she was done, he tossed her down on the bed.  She laughed, spreading
out and inviting him back for more, but when Sam grabbed his cock he

“What the fuck!?” Sam said, eyes wide as he looked down at his naked cock.

“Oops,” Pam said, not all that concerned.  "Looks like you’re going to have to go on a fishing trip.“

Sam blinked at her, his mouth open as he tried to wrap his head around it.  "What…?  What happened?”

chuckled, then must have realized Sam was really freaking out, because
the smile went away and she reached out, putting a hand over his.  "It’s
okay.  The condom just slipped off.  We were goin’ at it pretty hard.  
No big deal.  I just need help getting it out.“

"It can come off?!” he asked, voice louder than he meant it to be.

Pam got to her knees and pulled him closer, wrapping her arms around his midsection.  "It’s okay, kid.  It happens sometimes.“

"Sorry,” Sam said, shaking his head.  "I’ve never worn one before.  I didn’t know they could just come off like that.“

smiled and patted his ass.  "Yup, it happens.  Now help me get it out,
put a new one on, and fuck me.  I wanna come at least two more times
tonight, and you haven’t even come once.”

Sam chuckled.  "Yes, ma’am,“ he said as he climbed onto the bed and spread her legs wide.

Inspiration:  "Nobody told me a condom can slip off during sex and get stuck inside you.”