Title: Written All Over My Face
Warnings/Tags: No on-screen sex, just lots of awkwardness post loss of virginity
Alternate Link: AO3
Summary/Inspiration: “I thought everyone would know I lost my virginity,
so I said a lot of awkward things and kept eying everyone the next day,
waiting for them to call me out on it. I made a fool of myself and
everyone thought I was being an ass."
Wondering what I’m doing? See my original post about Shit Nobody Told Me, part of The Fucklets Series.
Written All Over My Face
If Sam would’ve known, he probably could’ve said something or maybe
tied Dean up and left him on the bed in the motel room while he went out
to get breakfast, but he didn’t. He had no idea.
"Hey,” Dean drawled as their waitress came up to the table.
“Hi, what can I get for you?” she asked, politely ignoring the way Dean was smirking at her.
I’m really, really hungry this morning, ya know,” he said, flashing a
smile at her that had Sam scooting down in the booth and wishing the
floor would swallow them up.
“Okay,” the woman said, then turned to Sam. "Do you know what you want?“
kind of felt bad for her, but he felt even worse for himself. How was
he supposed to know his twenty-seven-year-old brother had never gotten
around to losing his virginity before last night? Sam had lost his
virginity in the back of a Pinto to a girl named Suzie when he was
fifteen, and the way Dean acted Sam had assumed his brother got laid
more often than he did.
"I’ll just take the breakfast special,” Sam said. "Eggs over easy and rye toast.“
opened his mouth, but Sam couldn’t take it. He could almost feel the
embarrassing line his brother was about to lay on the poor woman.
"He’ll have the same only with scrambled eggs,” Sam blurted.
“Ooh, ordering for me, Sammy?” Dean asked, then winked at the woman.
“Dude, knock it off,” Sam said as the woman hurried away.
it’s not like I can hide the fact that you popped my cherry last
night,” Dean said, rolling his eyes. "Might as well act like I had a
good time instead of blushing and stuttering my way through the day.“
sighed. "No one can tell you lost your virginity last night. It’s not
like it changes the way you look. There’s no stamp on your forehead.”
Dean frowned at him. "You don’t have to worry about us getting in trouble or anything. Nobody here knows we’re brothers.“
not the point,” Sam said, but then the waitress brought them their
coffees and Sam cringed as Dean made some ridiculous comment about how
hard the booth’s benches were. Sam tried his best to ignore it.
“Dean, would you please stop it?” Sam begged. "You’re going to get arrested for harassment or something.“
Dean yanked his arm out of his brother’s grasp and scowled at him. "Did you see the way that guy looked at me?”
doesn’t know you lost your virginity last night!” Sam said, then
realized how loudly he’d said it when a woman in track pants and a
glittery shirt huffed and moved to the next aisle in the grocery store.
“Sam, you can just stop it, okay?” Dean said, then shrugged. "I’m not embarrassed that everybody can see it.“
Sam counted to ten in his head as Dean happily tossed another bag of salt into the cart and moved down the aisle.
The bank teller was still sputtering when Sam grabbed Dean’s arm and dragged him away from the poor, traumatized man.
"Let go of me!” Dean growled, but Sam had a good grip and didn’t let go until they were outside.
pushed Dean against the side of the bank and pressed his chest against
Dean’s. "If you think it’s so obvious, then you should know when I lost
my virginity, so go ahead, tell me when I lost it.“
shrugged. "You must’ve lost it when you were in college. Oh, was it
Jess? Dude, way to go! I bet she was all experienced and taught you so
Sam rolled his eyes. "I was fifteen. Lost it to Suzie Miller in Nampa, Idaho.“
frowned, thinking about it for a moment. "Fifteen? Nampa. Oh, when
Dad and I took out the ghost of that serial killer,” he said, nodding.
Then he paused, face screwing up in confusion. "I don’t remember you
acting different after you… oh.“
Sam almost felt bad for him.
Almost. The blush spread from his cheeks to his ears and even his neck.
"Nobody can tell,” Sam said yet again.
“I made an ass of myself today,” Dean said, letting out a huff of laughter as he shook his head.
“Yeah, you did,” Sam said, leaning in closer and smiling at his dork of a brother, “but you also got laid last night.”
Dean chuckled. "Yeah, I did. And I wanna do it again tonight.“
if you stop traumatizing the bank teller,” Sam said, failing to hide
his smile. "We still need info out of him, and I think he’s a little
Dean snorted. "He should be scared. Dean
Winchester lost his virginity last night. No one is safe from my
seductive charm now,” he said as he slapped Sam’s ass and headed for the
door to the bank.
Sam smiled as he followed his brother back inside the building.